Sunday, May 04, 2008
self

it does seem like i was on hiatus for awhile now, lack of updates are probably due to my hectic and unhealthy lifestyle. Besides, whatever i'm going through at the moment is beyond my understanding. no point going into deep thoughts...

recently, i find any justification of anything in any circumstances to be utter bullocks.
i missed cell group because i fear that i would not have enough time to finish my LEO club's task, but i justified my absence by being 'busy' and having to stay back late in uni as well as staying up late to do what i HAD to do. so yea, i CHOSE to miss cell group to do what i HAD to do. biggest mistake ever.

just the other day, i was trying to make up my mind on to whether to go for my 9am replacement class, help out my friend in a foosball tournament and going to church for Pastor Kong Hee's service. Guess what, i actually decided to help out my friend in that ridiculous game.
Luckily Gladys (cell member) put some senses into my head and straight out told me "you're missing church for -that-?!" ...

on my way to Asia Cafe, Yasir (another friend that have decided to help out in that event) told me " you're gonna skip class for -this-!?" ...

damn! what was i thinking!? i hate foosball... and i hate class! haha, no...but it was a class that i would actually end up staying in bed anyways. hence, i went church.

Justification? because i WANTED to! simple eh?

CURRENTLY, dealing with friends who are desperate to go church but not desperate to know God. i'm taking it as a ministry. i have to. God knows what i'll say to the person who's willing to miss church just because i insisted that we should go earlier to get better seats. God knows how i'll even respond the next time when she comes to me for advice or even council regarding her so called faith. i don't need this. God help me. she actually remind me of old-self...
this-is-bad.