Tuesday, July 18, 2006
chicken shit

maybe i was a coward...
maybe i was just afraid of facing that person...
maybe i fear that I'll be clueless of what to do and what to say if the person saw me...
maybe it was hate...who knows.

i just realized that my 'feeling of discomfort' tends to get the best of me.
moments of silence often occur even when i'm with my closest friend if there's a stranger around.
worst still, if i was directly uncomfortable with a particular individual...
my tolerance and patience level do compromise but often go against my will.

that.is.why.i...Flee.

when someone i'm uncomfortable with stays at my place, i'll do anything to avoid him.
simple... i flee. i'll shut myself in my room or get out from the house.

if i'm introduced or having a conversation with an individual that i'm uncomfortable with, i give a genuine looking smile and kindly excuse myself.

so here's the reason for this post.
i saw her. (the girl who does not have a problem of expecting help and ignoring you after that)
She was at the same appartment i was staying [she moved here. dang it!]
i was about to take the lift up and saw her waiting for the lift too.

Aw Hell No! there was no flippin' way i was going to get in the same lift as her. i could give her my genuine looking smile... but there was no escaping what could be the most uncomfortable lift up 10+ stories in my whole life. so i turned away... pretending to check my mail box till she entered the lift.

highlight of my day actually came before this incident.
which was meeting Ainaa who's back from Melbourne at the Mamak opposite my appartment.
it was really great seeing her again. and i got invited to her sister's wedding next month.
should be cool... to experience a Malay wedding for the very first time.